27 August, 2009
That which we fear will most definitely come upon us.
When we live in fear, we are exhibiting a form of resistance - - resistance to love, resistance to God. But we are also resisting the fear of the thing that we fear.
Remember, the universal law that resistance causes persistence? That is precisely what is in effect here. Rather than resisting fear, or resisting the fear of a thing, notice your feelings and notice your thoughts when you are feeling fear. The thing you fear is simply a pattern of thoughts being replayed from the past. Notice that you have fear. Notice everything that comes up for you around this fear.
Another thing to notice about fear is that it is at the root of everything that stops us. When you feel you can’t ask someone for help, fear is at the root. Maybe you fear looking bad in that person’s eyes. Or, maybe you have a fear of not looking good. Maybe your fear is of someone saying “no.” Is “no” so harmful? When you get a “no” from someone, don’t you have exactly what you had before you asked? Look closely and you will see that nothing has changed for you except now you are left with whatever meaning that you assign to that “no.” If “no” means rejection to you, then you aren’t simply letting “no” mean “no.” Fear is at the root.
Getting past fear isn’t always easy. You first must accept what is so about the situation. You need to look closely to understand where your fear is coming from. You need to determine if there is more than one source of fear and get real with yourself rather than making up stories or justifications about why the fear is present. You must stop hiding your true feelings from yourself if you’re going to get out of fear and into a place that empowers you!
There are two types of fear – authentic and inauthentic. Authentic fear is in play when you are being faced with real danger. As an example, you’re out walking by yourself and you have ended up in an unknown area of the city. It’s dark and you see a stranger approaching you with a gun in his hand. The type of fear you will be feeling is authentic fear. You are authentically in danger. There is something that is happening right now that is placing your life in danger.
Inauthentic fear doesn’t feel any differently to the body. The feelings you experience may be the same. But when inauthentic fear is present, you are in no real danger. For example, you are at work and you have been feeling pressured by your boss to perform at a higher rate. You have been fired from jobs before. The economy is rough, jobs are scarce, and you are feeling the fear of losing your job, the fear of not being able to feed your family, and the fear of not looking good in the eyes of your fellow employees, your friends, and your family. This fear is real. But it’s inauthentic. It’s all based on something you believe might happen in your future – not something that is happening right now.
Do you see the difference?
In order to get past the fear and into a place of power, you must get real with yourself about why the fear is present. Determine if the fear is authentic or inauthentic. If the fear is inauthentic, just distinguish it for what it is – the fear of something that you’ve determined could happen in your future. Then, make the conscious choice to replace the fear with love, with trust, and with peace. You can allow yourself to love and trust that everything will be alright just as easily as you allow yourself to have fear. It’s simply a matter of choosing to believe different thoughts.
Don’t be fooled by your bodily sensations. The same feelings you feel when you first fall in love are the same bodily sensations you have when you are afraid of something; butterflies in the stomach, lack of appetite, nervousness, sweaty palms. The bodily sensations are the same but the value, or assignment of meaning that we give to them differ greatly. Don’t be swayed by what you feel in your body. Choose love and faith over fear and you will be able to walk successfully in peace.
Transformational Thinking Blog by Brian Keith Eaker is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.